Christian Family Life Today
by Duke | Posted on Friday, June 10th, 2011
Recently the Christian family life has been on my mind since I have had a drastic change in lifestyle myself. In the first time in 22 years I am no longer working 60 – 70 hours a week. It has been quite an adjustment and I am sure it is not over yet. However it has made me think about in all honesty, the need to work all those hours for all those years. I always prided myself in being a good provider for my family. Even as a single dad raising teens and Mr. mom, I still worked a lot of hours. I just have to wonder, was that God’s best?“Genesis 25:29 Now Jacob cooked a stew; and Esau came in from the field, and he was weary. 30 And Esau said to Jacob, “Please feed me with that same red stew, for I am weary.” Therefore his name was called Edom. 31 But Jacob said, “Sell me your birthright as of this day.” 32 And Esau said, “Look, I am about to die; so what is this birthright to me?” 33 Then Jacob said, “Swear to me as of this day.” So he swore to him, and sold his birthright to Jacob. 34 And Jacob gave Esau bread and stew of lentils; then he ate and drank, arose, and went his way. Thus Esau despised his birthright.”
The state of Christian Family Life Today
As a pastor, and as I look at the state of our Christian families today, I am starting to think that we have bought into a mindset and cultural value that is contrary to our precious faith. What is more important? Is providing material things more important than instilling in our families solid scriptural and emotional values? Have we traded our birthright for a bowl of stew? What has happened to Christian family life today?
Esau was only concerned about his needs at the moment. He was tired and hungry let that immediate need be the deciding factor in his decision making process. How many times do we make our decisions based upon what we see as our immediate needs? I have done that many times. In the pursuit of the american dream of nice homes, nice cars, and nice toys in the garage, I have many times made decisions based upon my need to maintain a certain lifestyle and standard of living that hurt my ability to honor and promote Christian family values and the abundant life God has promised us. You see, when Jesus said that He came to give life and life more abundantly, He wasn’t talking about nice cars and fancy houses, He was talking about a truly wonderful and fulfilling life spiritually and emotionally. We must get out of our consumer culture mindset.
Challenging questions on the state of your Christian family life.
Let me ask you some pretty challenging questions. I am not here pointing fingers at you. I am just trying to get you to think.
- How many hours per week do you work just to pay for your car payments? How many cars do you need? What does the new car do that a quality used car would not do? Those hours spent working for that new car payment, what do you think God would want you to do with that time instead?
- How many hours a week do you work to pay for that extra garage space at your house, or that swimming pool, or hot tub? Do you really need that top of the line remodeling job, or could you do with something a little less extravagant? How many hours do you work just to pay for the extra? What do you think God would want you to do with the extra time if it wasn’t so extravagant.
- After child care, gas, the extra car payment, insurance, clothing, ect. How much are you actually gaining financially by having two people work outside the home? Is it worth 1 or 2 bucks an hour? Is it worth not having your children raised by you? Is it really that important to have those extra things?
I am no expert on financial planning or being a great example of how to make these types of decisions, but as a pastor I am coming to realize we have to do something to change the way Christians operate in their family lives today. Our children are suffering. Our families are in shambles, and even in Christian families, there is no time for God in the mix of Job, Home, and Family Life. He gets an hour on Sunday if He is lucky.
The role of men in Christian Family Life Today
Men, I am going to speak quite bluntly to you right now. God holds you accountable for the spiritual condition of your family. What are your goals in life? To obtain stuff or instill values in your family? It starts with you! In my own life, I can tell you from experience, that a child will not remember the latest video gaming system you bought them, they will remember if you spent time with them! If you are doing what I did, and spending all your time working so you can keep a certain lifestyle, you are not giving them what they most need. They don’t need stuff, they need YOU! They need to see a father who loves them enough to be there!
I know, that many of you are thinking that Pastor Duke is living in fantasy land. You are thinking that in today’s real world, you just cannot make it on less than you are making now. Well you are right! Not if your values are about keeping up with what the media, Madison avenue, and the world tells you that you “have to have”.
The role of women in Christian Family life today.
Recently I have met a couple of ladies that I respect greatly. They are stay at home mom’s who are making a buck go farther than I ever dreamed possible that anyone could make a buck stretch. As a resource, and as an investigation as to whether you can make a lifestyle change, I would encourage you to visit their websites. My Money Mission and House of Collums. Both of these ladies are awesome!
Finally I would just like to ask a few more challenging questions.
- What do you think your children will benefit more from in the long run? You having extra money, or you having extra time?
- What do you think your wife will benefit more from the in the long run? A new dress or new shoes, or a husband that has time and energy to be there for her?
- What do you think your husband will benefit more from? A couple of extra bucks income coming in every day or a home that is his place of sanctuary and rest?
- What do you think God will benefit more from? People who are focused on the things of this world, or people who are instilling the values of the kingdom in their spouses and children and the world around them?
Now that is something to think about!
If you would like to learn more about Christian family life today
If you would like to continue learning more about Christian family life then I suggest you read my article on Family Worship, or my list of Bible Verses about Family. You can also read some great articles on Christian Family Life Today at Focus on the Family
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DUKE!!! That was so awesome of you!!! Since Reagan is my coupon-clippin' hero, it was quite the honor to be in the same paragraph as her!!!
That was so sweet of you to include us….that gave me much-needed encouragement today as I am trying, yet again, to make our dollars go farther than ever before!!!
Amen! We've downsized quite a bit (from 3400+ sq ft to 1200!) to be able to follow our dream/conviction of homeschooling while living on one income without having a stressed out head of the household. It can be a feat to not covet your neighbors stuff, but as hubby recently said, how much 'stuff' do you really need?
Nice touch, Duke, including A. Marie and Reagan!
On the subject of "stuff," I find I accumulate too much and then go back and get rid of a lot of it to the reuse place anyway!